Newspaper History presents media sourced from a United States newspaper dating back 108 years.

  • Little Johnnie’s Fears

    From the Newark Evening Star, December 21, 1914.

    Where we used to live we had
        A fireplace, big and wide,
    An’ all that Santy had to do
        Was hold his breath an’ slide,
    An’ squeeze hisself until he fit
        The hole, an’ then jest drop—
    An’ he knowed where the stockin’s was,
        ‘Cause that was where he’d stop.

    Where we used to live it was
        No trick for him to climb
    Up to the chimbly on the roof
        An’ find us, Christmas-time;
    But now I’m worryin’ for fear
        He won’t know where he’s at,
    Or mebbe can’t get in at all!
        We’re livin’ in a flat.

    We’re livin’ in a flat, an’ say,
        You mus’ be mos’ polite,
    Or else the janitor he’ll go
        An’ lock you out at night!
    There ain’t no chimbly to our house
        Where Santy Claus can slide—
    There ain’t no fireplace—just a pipe
        About two inches wide.

    They heat our flat with steam—that’s why
        I’m afraid he can’t get in
    With all his toys, an’ drums an’ things,
        Unless he’s awful thin;
    An’ how’s he gon’ to wiggle out
        When he gets in? Gee whiz!
    There’s such an awful little hole
        There where the sizzle is!